Adoption Resources & Tips on Adoption

Things We Learned From Our Experience: Tips for Prospective Adoptive Parents

Set a realistic, yet flexible, goal. Searching for a child of a certain age or sex, may be limiting both in terms of time and availability. While this might sound trite, adopting a child is not like selecting a puppy or a car. There are not a lot of "options'. Understand, too, that such specifics may result in the separation of a family if allowed by the respective agency.

Learn to be patient.   Even though it's "faster' to adopt internationally versus nationally, international adoption can be a long, and heart rending process. Every country and agency has its own way of doing things and their processes may seem Byzantine to those of us who are used to our high-speed, high-tech society. You will become involved with social services in your home state for your home study and compliance with state laws, the federal Immigration and Naturalization authorities and documentation demands, and in Polish adoptions, at least one of three approved Polish government agencies listed at the bootom of this page.

Commit yourself. Remember that you are on a mission. But don't confuse your mission with the need to "rescue" a child. While there still a large number of Polish children in need of adoption, the orphanages undertaking their care have a deep and abiding concern for these children's well-being. Keep in mind that international adoption is both a time-consuming and costly experience. You must be willing to make as many visits as necessary to the prospective child and country to ensure that everything runs smoothly and that the child is accepting of you and the future.

Let people know. Tell your friends, family, coworkers, religious leaders and others that you're interested in adopting. You'll not only be developing a network of support, but may actually be put in touch with a very valuable contact.

Sign up with an experienced agency. Even though we did it independently, we would definitely work with an agency like Catholic Charities if we were to adopt again.  Working with an organization that has direct contacts, and firsthand experience with adoption in a particular country, can alleviate any potential problems and save you months, and even years, of time. Additionally, authorities have a higher regard for an applicant working with a recognized agency which maintains an active presence in that country. If you choose to work through your international adoption process using an adoption facilitator or some licensed adoption agency other than Catholic Charities, verify their experience and insist on full disclosure of all costs and expenses upfront to avoid unpleasant surprises and unneeded frustrations.

Enlist the aid of a translator. We were fortunate in that we had family and friends in Poland who could overcome any potential language barriers. If you're working with an experienced agency, they should be able to assist with translations or put you in touch with a qualified individual.

Know your child. Even before you meet, you should learn everything you can about your prospective child -- background, heritage likes and dislikes health history, etc. The agency you're working with should be able to provide reports from social workers, doctors, etc. While it's not necessary for you to master the child's language, it is important to know a few key words and phrases to help alleviate some of the initial awkwardness. For the first meeting, bring some toys, balloons and photos that will enable you to interact with the child. Do not shower them with gifts, as it may overwhelm them and either inhibits the bonding process or sets up false expectations.

Be prepared. Do everything you can to make sure things are in place when the time arrives. Have a room ready for the child(ren) so they know they'll have a place of their own. Let your friends and families know when you'll be returning. Plan small get-togethers to acquaint the children with loved ones so as not to overwhelm them.

Make sure that you have all the proper documentation necessary for that particular country and that your passports are in order. In Poland, the following information is required:

Letter of Intention	A formal letter stating your intentions to adopt a child, reasons on which the decision was based, and the age and gender of the child(ren) you hope to adopt.
Identificaton	Certified copies (not reproductions) of you birth certificate(s) and marriage certificate (if applicable). If you or your spouse had been divorced, you must also include a copy of the divorce decree.
Clear Police Record	These certificates may be obtained from your local police department and certify that you have not been arrested for, charged with, or convicted of any offense.
Financial status	Includes sources of income and a letter from your employer that includes both a recommendation and salary verification. In some countries, you may also be asked to provide copies of recent tax returns.
Health certificate	A letter from your physician verifying that your physical and mental health does not present an obstacle to parenting.
Home study	Official copy of your home study and a copy of the license of the agency that undertook the study.
State approval	Approval for adoption from your state's Department of Children and Family Services. Your home study agency should be able to assist with this documentation.
State law	An official edition of the adoption law of your particular state, which is certified by a notary public with the clause that it is the complete text of the law currently in effect.
INS Approval Letter	It is important to initiate the process of pre-approval from the U.S. Immigration and Naturalization Service as you begin your home study.
Other information	You may also want to include letters of recommendation from professionals, pastors and Polish connections, as well as photos of your family and home

Currently the Polish Minister of Economy, Labor and Social Welfare only authorizes the Public Adoptive-Guardian Center (Publiczny Osrodek Adopcyjno-Opiekunczy) to evaulate Polish children for foreign adoptions. The Center maintains a list of all children residing in orphanages who are available for international adoption because their parents have died, have relinquished all rights to them, or have had their parental rights relinquished by a court.

Foreign prospective parents may be found qualified for adoption in Poland by any of three authorized adoption centers. The potential adoptive parents or their duly licensed American adoption agencies may submit documents for adoptive parent candidates to acquire approval to adopt from Poland only to these centers:

Public Adoptive-Guardian Center (also mentioned above)
Mrs. Elzbieta Podczaska, Director
Publiczny Osrodek Adopcyjno-Opiekunczy
ul. Nowogrodzka #75
02-018 Warszawa
Tel/fax: 011 (if calling from the U.S.) 48 (Poland) 22 (Warsaw) 622-0370 to 72, 622-0372
(Mrs. Podczaska does not speak English, but members of her staff do.)

 National Adoptive-Guardian Center of the Children's Friends Society (Towarzystwo Przyjaciol Dzieci – TPD)
Ul. Krakowskie Przedmiescie 6
00-325 Warszawa
Tel/fax: 011/48/22/827-7813; phone 435-4677 through 88
e-mail:koao-tpd@wp.pl

Catholic Adoptive-Guardian Center (Katolicki Osrodek Adopcyjno-Opiekunczy)
Ul. Grochowska 194/196
04-357 Warszawa
Tel: 011/48/22/610-5149; fax: 610-6123

Don't set false expectations. While adopting a child is extreme fulfilling, it is also a potentially moving experience for both you and the child. Like any new parent, you will be filled with fear, questions and anxiety. Your former daily routine will no longer exist and your life will revolve around your child. At the same time, you must realize that this is a foreign and frightening experience for your child. Additionally, your child may require treatment for health, emotional or developmental problems. Some may be treated with lots of love and hugs. Others may require professional help.

Enjoy the experience. Yes, your life will change -- for the better. Things you've seen or done before will take on new meaning. As you experience things through (and with) your child, revel in the wonderment of it all.

The Polish American Association adoption page has a variety of information and links to follow in regards to better understanding the process of adopting from Poland.

The Adoption Services of Catholic Charitites of the Archdiocese of Chicago has considerable experience with adoptions from Poland and lists contact information. Catholic Charities has always done its best to be the one place a family can go to, when all others would or could not help keep the process doable and affordable.

The Adoption Services of the Catholic Charities of the Archdiocese of Milwaukee provides helpful advice and resources for adoption and a downloadable brochure.

Catholic Charities USA provides a convenient way to locate the Catholic Charities office nearest you.

www.5000milesmovie.com provides information about one couple's adoption experiences which became a documentary available on DVD.

Another example of adoption success is the CARITAS For Children Founders' adoption story. Click here to view this document (PDF Format).